Other news: social and cutlural calendar

-Said goodbye to Veronique this week. I am doing ok, but the week before she left I had a good cry at least three times.

-Went to the Fiestas of Pitic last night. It’s the town’s five day festival. All of the events are free, and they get some pretty good, and famous, musicians and others to come in. The one I got to see was Lila Downs, the singer who did the sound track for the movie Frida. She had a wonderful concert. I wish I would have been able to take advantage of the festival more than just last night.

-Next week is the last week of classes. I am hoping to make some extra time in the week to say my offical goodbyes to my current and former classmates. Although I am ready for no more class assignments, I will miss the community that I have gotten every day. (Even though I will be here until July, I probably won´t see many of them once finals are done).

-BGSU work? Hmmm….between all the other things going on (both expected and unexpected) the past several weeks, suffice it to say that I haven’t been spending too much time on school work. However, the deadlines and requirements continue to come sooner and sooner. Time to step it up again!

A Week of Farewells (2nd semester)

This week is Goodbyes Part 2. (More parts later….I am afraid the farewell process will not be short.)

In part, because it’s the 23^rd on Friday, which was the original day for the final day of classes before we had the strike. As a result, many of the other exchange students are leaving because their pre-existing summer plans don’t allow them stay to the end of the semester, which is now June 20.

Tomorrow, Thursday, my “Advanced Spanish for Foreigners” class is a having farewell party. The two I will remember from that class are Brian (US) and Hirochi (Japan), for all the times we laughed together in class; I enjoyed getting to know both of them.

On Friday, there is a carne asada for Veronique, who leaves next Wednesday. She will be the most hard to say goodbye to of all the people I have met this year; her friendship has been a tremendous blessing to me and in many ways she has helped keep me

(semi)-sane.

The timing of the other goodbye this week is more unexpected. The family with whom I have been living. I am moving out on Saturday. As you very well know, this semester I have been super stressed. I have not been able to do a good job of managing that stress and living with a family. In the last month, there have also been many incidents in which they have failed in their part of the housing arrangement. Both they and I have responsibility in the breaking of this arrangement, and therefore also our relationship.

I have been in contact with the Exchange Program throughout this process. They have graciously offered that I can stay in a house that is currently empty, similar to my situation at the beginning of the school year. (I have the most amazing Exchange Program ever!) My decision to move out was 1) that despite their efforts and despite appearances that all is well, there are still things going on that can resurface at any time, 2) That despite my efforts, my ongoing irritability and frustration in response to these incidents is not going to improve by sheer will power, and as a result it will continue to be a tense environment for me.

The decision has been very painful and difficult. I have doubts about my view of the situation. I worry about what impact I am leaving behind; especially in the groups I represent, i.e. an American, a Christian, etc. However, I also think and hope that my decision to move out will mean one less stress, and will prove to the better decision.

In regards to the relationship, I also hope, as a trusted family member told me, that I (and they) might even find a little grace.

PS
I wrote this last Wednesday before telling them. I have indeed received grace. Upon telling them of my decision, the "kids" (ages 16-21) responded very kindly, saying that I should come and visit. Luz Belia choose to not respond right away (which I said she didn´t have to), but the the next day she said the I could come and eat with them anytime (she sells food midday so I would pay of the food I´d consume) and that the doors are alway open and I am welcome anytime. I truly feel that there is there is hope for reconciliation and that my moving out will hopefully prove to help restore our relationship to something closer to what it was before instead of the tension and stress of the last month.

I am now in my new house as of Saturday, which I will have all to my self for most of the time. It belongs to the university, and although it is not the same house I lived in last August, it is a similar situation in that the Exchange program is allowing me to stay there.

"Cultural" experiences

Lately my "cultural" experiences happen from just living, in other words, not intentional. You´d think that there wouldn´t be room for too many since my days consist of 90% studying. Well... life has a way of suprising you. This week, it was a trip to the ER, my trip to the ER.

Before you freak out, I am fine; but here`s the story. On Monday night while I was studying in the grad study room with Veronique, I started feeling weird; my stomach felt funny, I was a little nauseous, light headed. Similar to a migrane without a headache. So I stopped studying, layed down, slept a little, awoke a couple times to other grad students popping in and out. However, the resting didn`t change how I felt.I thought about just going home, but one of the grad student`s boyfriend is a MD resident, and so they told me to wait so he could check on me. Well, I figured it was a weird migrane (usually I get the headache first) or food poisoning, although the food I ate that day was normal, and all I needed was to go home and sleep and wait it out (beign my dad`s tried and true expert medical advice). I took the check up from the doc; but when they suggested the hospital, I said no.

However, I did accept their offer to give me a ride home which I gladly chose over riding my bike. As we were walking out to the car, I suddenly got very light headed and then nauseous. All in all, I vomitted and fainted. So, needless to say, they again insisted on taking me to the hospital, and I had no energy to try to argue, even though I felt it was unnecessary.

To the emergency room I go. With the res doc, I got speedy admittance. They did a blood test, diagnosed me with gastroenteritis (the most ambigious all inclusive stomach issue ever), gave me an IV, wrote me a prescription for an antibiotic, and after about 3 hours sent me home.

The cultural part: First and foremost the hospitality and giving of the people here, ONCE AGAIN. 4 others brought me to the hospital, the resident doctor and girlfriend hang out for the waiting and checking up on me until 2 hours later they knew I was ok, the other student waited the whole tiem until I was released to give Vero and I a ride home (even though we said we could get a taxi), and Veronique keep me company in the ER. Everyone but Veronique are mere acquaintences from school. Vero is super stressed with finishing her thesis, but made the time for me. Again, so humbling.

Cultural part 2: Obviously the hospital visit. The hospital I went to was great. I hear it depends on which one you go to, but this one was great. I waited around for awhile more, probably more than the US, but I can`t say I`m an expert about US ERs either. The other thing that struck me was the cost: 250 pesos total (3 hours in the ER, blood work, IV), aka under $25 US. That was for me without insurance, when most here are covered by insurance. No wonder they don`t think twice about going to the hospital.My stomach is still on the mend, but I`m getting better, plus I got a trip to the ER out of the deal.

Post-post: My other "cultural" experience is my living situation. Whether or not it`s cultural, (a lot has to do with the particular circumstances going on or just the challenges of life in community), there are still differences. It`s been a challenging lately, challenging not only in the details of the situation, but also knowing how to respond with my various roles and all that I represent. And all that just from living with a family. "Culture" anyone?

Short (?) Snippets

So I tend to be long winded when it comes to words. My writing class the past two semesters hasn’t improved the length of what I have to say, in fact it’s probably made it increased it (although hopefully I now say it more clearly.) Since many of my entries tend to follow suit when it comes to volume, I thought I would try and shake things up this week, and write a few brief snippets!

1. After three weeks! After three weeks with no classes, the strike has finally ended and we are back to school on Monday! I am excited to get back to classes, to have a library again, to spend less time in the house, that the conflict has ended, and that I now know how many more weeks we will need to make up at the end of the school year. Woo hoo! Rumor has it that the governor got involved. Whatever the case, I am glad it’s done!
2. GRRRR…. Did you know that if you write “grrrr…”, it is the same in English, Spanish, and French? (However, I think that the sound might change!) Thanks Veronique for this fun fact!
3. Lame duck: In a conversation with my parents this week, my dad appropriately used this phrase to life here. I have been in Mexico nine months (wow!) and have only two remaining. So, I am starting to be neither here nor there, and I don’t want to put forth energy in people or events when I have limited time left and /or when I am not particularly interested. I don’t know if my lame/sitting duck attitude is good or bad, probably both, but that doesn’t matter. “It is what it is,” a part of the process, and describes (in part) where I’m at.
4. “Culture is when you think things should go a certain way or be done a certain way and there’re not (or vice versa).” My mom said something similar to me when I was describing to her a situation going on in with the family with whom I’m living. I have caught myself thinking how I would “solve the problem” with internal thoughts like, “If only they did this, then…” or “Why don’t they just…?”. However, I try to remind myself that there are lots of factors, cultural and other, of which I know nothing, and having cabin fever doesn’t help either. And so I try to be patient, observe, wait, and most importantly, keep my opinions to myself! (Hopefully I have been successful.)
5. Well, as this is "short"....I am going to call it a night/post! Until next time...

Super Bowl Sunday

I am watching the Super Bowl. It’s on one of the basics channels, and surprisingly no one is in the house so I don’t feel bad for hogging the tv. Some of you, I am sure, are groaning (for any number of reasons) the fact that even here in Mexico I am watching the Super Bowl and participating in and contributing to.... (you feel in the blank (s). Others of you probably think it’s great that I can watch the Super Bowl. I myself find it funny: first of all I don’t care a bit about the game or the teams, but it’s a little bit of “home” and yet it is definitely the Mexican version with the commentary all in Spanish and none of the famous/infamous commercials. Plus I’m watching it by myself. Are you finding this humorous yet? I hope so.

Ok, so to something a little more substantial. Regarding last week’s blog and my struggles of being here this 2^nd semester, it’s still the same. Good moments, down moments, but overall, it’s still hard and I haven’t been my normal happy self.

That being said, there wasn’t much new to say. So I translated the text I wrote for my writing class two weeks ago,” Lessons from the Baseball Field” (see next post). Furthermore, it holds application for me while I continue the process of learning here.

Baseball, huh? Hmm, I see a sports theme. Oh right, the Super Bowl…, maybe I should check what’s happening….Woo hooo! Touch down for the Giants! (Don’t be fooled, I still not really watching.)

PS Ok, just kidding again. How can I not pay attention to such an exciting finish! Sorry Patriots fans, quite a disappointing end to their amazing season. But, bravo Giants!

Lessons from the baseball field

Near my house are several baseball fields, and around them is a dirt path that I use to run or walk and watch people. Since it winter and the temperatures are cooler, teams of children have been learning how to play baseball.

I remember when I learned this sport: I had participated in a little league one summer and I also played in the backyard with my brothers and dad. However, I thought that everyone else were better baseball players than I was, and I felt inferior when I struck out or missed a catch. As a result, after a few years playing with my brothers and after just one summer in the city league, I quit.

However, I enjoy watching live baseball, especially here in Hermosillo as it is a very popular sport. I have gone to several games here, and each time I attend, I want to understand it more. As a result, I took note of the children on the fields during their practice. Upon observing them, I was intrigued: their way of learning how to play baseball was much different than how I learned.

What caught me by surprise was that they weren’t playing a game; instead they were practicing the skills, in isolation. In one of the fields, a group of kids were leaning how to bat. An adult would pitch the ball several times so that the little one had several opportunities to bat, regardless of whether or not he/she successfully hit the ball. In other fields, the children were practicing catching. However, this skill can be subdivided, which they did. One group only caught ground balls, and a different group received just pop-flies. In yet another field, the little leaguers practiced running the bases. In each of the groups, the children repeated the same skill almost the entire practice giving them the chance to master it.

Observing them gave me cause to reflect. I had not learned in the same manner as they were when I was a child. Yes, we were taught the various skills, but were given little time to learn them and soon we had to use them in a game. As mentioned earlier, I thought I wasn’t very good at baseball, when in reality, perhaps I only lacked practice.

The lessons given on the baseball diamonds hold application off the field as well. Similar to these children, we as adults continue trying t learn new things or beginning new stages of life; it could be a job change, a move to another city, the beginning of a relationship, a marriage, the start of having a family, etc. With each of these, there are skills or aspects that we need to learn first before we feel comfortable and /or are successful. Sometimes we become discouraged in the transition because we have forgotten that we must learn the parts before the whole. At least, this is true for me. So the next time I try something new or am discouraged in the process, I will remember these lessons from the baseball field.

Reverse reverse culture shock

I expected to have culture shock when my parents were here in Mexico as that was what happened when Karen visited in October. There were still various moments when differences surfaced, but I didn’t feel the unexpected shock that I did in October.

The same occurred with Iowa when I returned with my parents to see my brothers for New Years. I expected to feel very out of place and experience reverse culture shock, but I was surprised how easily I slipped back into the norms, rhythms, and routines of life there. Sure, I was more cognoscente and reflective than normal and there were actions and comments to prove it: 1) shouting “They’re so many blues eyes and blond here!” upon finally spotting my friends in the airport, 2) taking pictures of the snow and toy tractors, and 3) to seeing my family’s outings (taking a walk on the prairie or going to a presidential campaigning event) as culture events instead of mere activities. However, these were the exception. Iowa is, after all, a place I have gone to visit for the last ten years. In that sense, it was just another trip.

Returning to Mexico, however, surprised me. And so I have experienced reverse-reverse culture shock. I have been comfortable and happy here overall, so I didn’t expect to have difficulty returning, especially with plenty of work awaiting me to prevent myself from over thinking. However, I felt like a stranger. Is this really my home? Have I really lived here for 4 months? Is the relationship with the family here as good as it appeared when my parents were here? Do I even know people here and do they care if I am back? I know I should have a little trouble switching back to Spanish, but my Spanish is horrible! With the changes for the next semester, will it be like stating over and do I have the energy to going being brave and outgoing and hard core? Overall, I am a stranger here.

There are many reasons for my reverse reverse culture shock. The time that my parents were here was picture perfect, and although true in many regards, was not reflective of day to day reality. The feelings and struggles I had during my hard breakdown weekend still exist because the reasons have not changed: friends have left, school is not in session, there are many changes ahead for the next semester. Leaving my family is always hard because I treasure the time I do have with them. Finally, relationships are the hardest for me, not at the beginning, but going from the acquaintances to good solid friendships that have good depth, trust, and are worth keeping. Finally, my home culture is the US and not Mexico, and though I may fight against it at times, it still is what essentially defines me.

However, acknowledging the reverse reverse culture shock and validating the feelings that accompany it is half the battle. My Spanish is not back to par, but it’ll be back. Regarding people, I have a great family and a great base for developing a stronger relationship with them. I also have many friends and acquaintances here that are worth investing in. It helped tremendously when they were excited about making plans to hang out. Yes, I will still have reverse reverse culture shock and I have many changes and challenges ahead, but there are many many good things here. And knowing I am blessed is what will give me the strength and desire to continue to invest myself 110% in this adventure.

Foreigner's Perspective on a Foreigner's Life in a Foreign Country

Karen and I at Naranjero's Baseball game with Beto, the Coyote, mascot

Karen, Andres, and I

Michelle’s Visitor

This past week, I had the opportunity to come to Hermosillo and visit Michelle. “Who am I?” You must be thinking. I am a friend of Michelle’s from Denver. I first got to know Michelle when I moved to Denver just over four years ago. Anyway, I am a middle school math teacher who had a week off and was excited to use my Spanish and get a chance to see Michelle in Mexico. I studied Spanish in college as well as spent a semester in Honduras, so coming to Mexico was something that immediately excited me and what better excuse than to come and visit a friend!

So, why am I writing on her blog? Well, we thought it would be interesting for me to write in her blog as a foreigner’s perspective on a foreigner’s life in foreign country! So, I am going to try and give you some insights and share things that I have appreciated seeing and learning that Michelle might not think of. It has been extremely fun to see her life here and meet the people she comes in contact with every day, so with that, there are three things that I have to share with you.

1. Michelle knows a lot of people here in Hermosillo! Every where we went I was introduced to somebody new. It was crazy to me how many people she knows from class, church, her family, and just random friends! She is well connected! She had people she would just run into, call, or send text messages to. What was even more impressive to me was that most of the people she interacts with are Mexican, not other people from the U.S. She is embracing the culture, people, and way of life here in Mexico. She hasn’t been afraid to make friends, fit in, and be part of life here. It has been so fun to me to come to a country and meet locals and be a part of their everyday life; going to classes, parties, eating dinner, getting rides, and having conversations.
2. Michelle SIEMPRE esta usando su español. Michelle is always using her Spanish! This became apparent when all of her friends would give her a hard time about talking in English with me this week. Seriously, all of her friends asked her if she was going to speak English with me! I realized that I should be extremely thankful that she was willing to take a break from Spanish despite the fact that I was able to speak and understand Spanish. Apparently it is common knowledge here that Michelle won’t speak, write, or listen to things in English, even with other people from the United States! It’s her rule! She is here to learn, study, and practice Spanish, and that is what she is doing, hard core! Very Impressive! (Although she did admit that it was nice to have a break from Spanish this week and not have to think about every word she said.)
3. I have been blown away by Michelle’s courage and confidence. After seeing Michelle’s life here and talking with her about many things, I was constantly blown away by what she is doing. I have thought to myself over and over, wow! Some of the things I had heard about and read on her blog, but they struck me strongly while here. Here are some of those wow moments..

- She came and is here by herself, not knowing anyone! Everyone she knows she has met in the last three months.

- Michelle had to find a place to live all by herself! Yes, look in the newspaper, make phone calls, visit houses, meet strangers, all in Spanish! I speak Spanish and this freaks me out!

- Michelle doesn’t have a network of people who speak English. In fact she doesn’t even know or want to know if people speak English. She is disciplined enough to not use English even when should could!

- Things are different and can be uncomfortable and it doesn’t phase her.

- Michelle is confident. She doesn’t let the fact that she is a gringa in Mexico change who she is or what she does. Yet, people are comfortable with her, accepting, and welcoming

Although, I miss Michelle in Denver, it is great and amazing to see what she is doing here in Mexico. I don't feel as if she is so far away now that I know what an amazing new world she is a part of.

This week (October 8-14, 2007): Highlights and low points

Highlight #1: Going to the Hermosillo’s baseball team’s, The Naranjeros, opening game. (Baseball is pretty big here in Hermosillo, probably due to the proximity to the border and the US influence). It was fun to see participate in this cultural event, compare it the US, and just enjoy the social event of going to a game along and drinking a few Tecate (beer made in Sonora). To top off the night, the Naranjeros won!

Highlight #2: Thursday was one of those days that I was reminded why I wanted to study abroad, why I am in graduate school, and how lucky I am to live out this desire. It wasn’t anything earth shaking, just several conversations with professors, but I felt blessed none the less.

Highlight #3: Saw two Burrowing Owls when walking home from school at 9:00 p.m.

Low point: I had a class Saturday and Sunday to learn Movie Maker (also next weekend). The reason for learning Movie Maker is that I need to use it for my final project for my History course. However, the focus this weekend of the class was more advanced than I need to know. As a result, I was frustrated and upset to the point of tears, both yesterday and today. I ended up leaving early today as a result, but the good news is that I know that the both the professor of the Movie Maker class as well as my History class will be understanding.

Left to right: Leti and Ceci (students who work in the Exchange office), myself, and Marisol (primary Unison contact who has arranged many many details and has made it an easy adjustment for me)

At the opening game of the Naranjeros

View of Hermosillo from the Top of the "Cerro of the Campana", see Pictures of Hermosillo post last week. The bigger building in the center is the main cathedral.