This week is Goodbyes Part 2. (More parts later….I am afraid the farewell process will not be short.)
In part, because it’s the 23rd on Friday, which was the original day for the final day of classes before we had the strike. As a result, many of the other exchange students are leaving because their pre-existing summer plans don’t allow them stay to the end of the semester, which is now June 20.
Tomorrow, Thursday, my “Advanced Spanish for Foreigners” class is a having farewell party. The two I will remember from that class are Brian (US) and Hirochi (
On Friday, there is a carne asada for Veronique, who leaves next Wednesday. She will be the most hard to say goodbye to of all the people I have met this year; her friendship has been a tremendous blessing to me and in many ways she has helped keep me
(semi)-sane.
The timing of the other goodbye this week is more unexpected. The family with whom I have been living. I am moving out on Saturday. As you very well know, this semester I have been super stressed. I have not been able to do a good job of managing that stress and living with a family. In the last month, there have also been many incidents in which they have failed in their part of the housing arrangement. Both they and I have responsibility in the breaking of this arrangement, and therefore also our relationship.
I have been in contact with the Exchange Program throughout this process. They have graciously offered that I can stay in a house that is currently empty, similar to my situation at the beginning of the school year. (I have the most amazing Exchange Program ever!) My decision to move out was 1) that despite their efforts and despite appearances that all is well, there are still things going on that can resurface at any time, 2) That despite my efforts, my ongoing irritability and frustration in response to these incidents is not going to improve by sheer will power, and as a result it will continue to be a tense environment for me.
The decision has been very painful and difficult. I have doubts about my view of the situation. I worry about what impact I am leaving behind; especially in the groups I represent, i.e. an American, a Christian, etc. However, I also think and hope that my decision to move out will mean one less stress, and will prove to the better decision.
In regards to the relationship, I also hope, as a trusted family member told me, that I (and they) might even find a little grace.
PS
I wrote this last Wednesday before telling them. I have indeed received grace. Upon telling them of my decision, the "kids" (ages 16-21) responded very kindly, saying that I should come and visit. Luz Belia choose to not respond right away (which I said she didn´t have to), but the the next day she said the I could come and eat with them anytime (she sells food midday so I would pay of the food I´d consume) and that the doors are alway open and I am welcome anytime. I truly feel that there is there is hope for reconciliation and that my moving out will hopefully prove to help restore our relationship to something closer to what it was before instead of the tension and stress of the last month.
I am now in my new house as of Saturday, which I will have all to my self for most of the time. It belongs to the university, and although it is not the same house I lived in last August, it is a similar situation in that the Exchange program is allowing me to stay there.
